


Sports Group Chat

by ScrambledScreams



Category: Free!, Haikyuu!!, Yuri!!! on Ice (Anime)
Genre: Agender Viktor Nikiforov, Angst, Celiac Hinata, Crack, F/F, F/M, Genderfluid Otabek, Genderfluid Yamaguchi, Humor, Intentional Misgendering, M/M, Non-Binary Suga, So many ships, Swearing, Trans Character, Trans Kageyama, Trans Minami Kenjirou, Trans Yuri Plisetsky, accidental misgendering, at some point I mean this IS me, gonna add more tags as this goes on, headcanon dump, protect my short children, ships, that one really overused joke, trans Kiyoko, transmasculine JJ leroy
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2017-04-11
Updated: 2017-11-28
Packaged: 2018-10-17 14:19:40
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 10
Words: 10,247
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/10595772
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/ScrambledScreams/pseuds/ScrambledScreams
Summary: Phichit creates another group chat, but this time it's more than just figure skaters.





	1. Chapter 1

**Author's Note:**

> I will add usernames and the people behind them, Nagisa's kamojis, proper tags, and a proper title in the morning sue me. It's so late goddamn
> 
> MORNING EDIT: I didn't copy all the story there's more nehehe stupid clipboard
> 
> Afternoon edit: please tell me if any thing looks screwy I've edited this fifteen times I s2g 
> 
> Katsuki_Yuuri: Yuuri  
> Number1skatingmom/itsmeViorNokfort: Viktor  
> WinterTiger: Yuri  
> TheRealOtabek: Otabek  
> Kingkongpingpong: Guang-Hong  
> CrispytwinSara: Sara  
> CrispytwinMichele: Michele  
> Seung_Gil: Seung-Gil  
> Sexyandiknowit: Christophe  
> JJ-style: Jean-Jacques  
> IsabellaYang26: Isabella  
> SmolChickenNuggetSon: Minami  
> BasicallyNatashaRomanoff: Mila  
> NotPewdiepieK: Emil  
> Georgi Popovich: Georgi
> 
> Mamakoto: Makoto  
> BeautifulButterfly: Rei  
> freethemermaid2k17: Haru  
> #actualthug: Nagisa  
> NOTMYNAME: Gou
> 
> STAGBEETLESTHO: Momotarou  
> sharkjesus: Rin  
> SousuketheBuff: Sousuke  
> thesmollestswimmer: Nitori
> 
> TOSSTOME: Hinata  
> MilkKeg09: Kageyama  
> teammom: Suga  
> teamdad: Daichi  
> zettairyoiki: Noya  
> tinychihuahua: Yachi  
> respectyourelders: Tanaka  
> Yamagoodshit: Yamaguchi  
> thelastdinosaur: Tukishima  
> En-NoShit-a: Ennoshita  
> ActualGoddess: Kiyoko  
> iswearimnotathugitsjustmyface: Asahi
> 
> BROkuto: Bokuto  
> Akaaexcuseme: Akaashi
> 
> KuBRO: Kuroo  
> PokemonMaster: Kenma  
> RussianLion: Lev
> 
> OikawaNo: Iwaizumi  
> believeinouralienoverlord: Oikawa  
> Hanakawa03: Hanamaki  
> Matsumaki02: Matsukawa

PhiSHIT has added: Katsuki_Yuuri, Number1skatingmom, WinterTiger, TherealOtabek, KingKongpingpong, CrispytwinSara, CrispytwinMichele, Seung_Gil, Sexyandiknowit, JJ-style, IsabellaYang26, SmolChickenNuggetSon, BasicallyNatashaRomanoff, NotPewdiepieK, and Georgi Popovich to the group chat

PhiSHIT has added: Mamakoto, BeautifulButterfly, NOTMYNAME, freethemermaid2k17, and #actualthug to the group chat

PhiSHIT has added: STAGBEETLESTHO, sharkjesus, SousuketheBuff, and thesmollestswimmer to the group chat

PhiSHIT has added: TOSSTOME, MilkKeg09, teammom, teamdad, zettairyoiki, tinychihuahua, respectyourelders, Yamagoodshit, thelastdinosaur, En-NoShit-a, ActualGoddess, and iswearimnotathugitsjustmyface to the group chat

PhiSHIT has added: BROkuto and Akaaexcuseme to the group chat

PhiSHIT has added: KuBRO, RussianLion, and PokemonMaster to the group chat

PhiSHIT has added: believeinouralienoverlord and OikawaNo to the group chat

PhiSHIT: oh my god my fingers are so sore from all those names I better have gotten everyone 

BROkuto: oh wait this is the group chat you were telling us you were going to make isn't it

KuuBRO: hey

BROkuto: heyhey

KuuBRO: heyheyhey

BROkuto: heyheyheyhey

KuuBRO: heyheyheyheyhey

Akaaexcuseme: Don't you fucking dare Bokuto _enough_

BROkuto: ...

BROkuto: hey

Akaaexcuseme: hO

teammom: watch your heckin language there are kiddos

MamaKoto: Language!!

WinterTiger: if I swear do I finally escape this hell hole

PhiSHIT: *loud whisper* no one leaves

SousuketheBuff has left the conversation

PhiSHIT has added: SousuketheBuff

PhiSHIT: not on my watch boi

Zettairyoiki: o shit waddup

teammom: if you swear one more time

Zettairyoiki: what

teammom: I'm gonna put the volleyballs away on the top shelf

Zettairyoiki: yoU WOULDNT DARE

Zettairyoiki: babe youd help me wouldnt you

iswearimnotathugitsjustmyface: ....

Zettairyoiki: bETRAYAL

freethemermaid2k17: what is this

PhiSHIT: group chat~! Like I said I was gonna make

#actualthug: he was probably swimming instead of listening smh haru 

tinychihuahua: Oh my goodness there's so many people!!

tinychihuahua: I don't know all of you, so... Hi, my name is Yachi!

#actualthug: ahhhh you sound like you're adorable! (。・ω・。)

tinychihuahua: Thank you?

PhiSHIT: not everyone in here is gonna know each other, so doing introductions is a good idea

PhiSHIT: I'm Phichit Chulanont, and I do figure skating!

MamaKoto: My name is Tachibana Makoto, and I do swimming. It's nice to meet all of you!

tinychihuahua: I already introduced myself, but I'm one of the managers for Karasuno's male volleyball team!

WinterTiger: what is this, sports anonymous?

WinterTiger: Yuri Plisetsky. Figure skating. 

BROkuto: bokuto koutarou, and I play volleyball for Fukurodani highschool!

Akaaexcuseme: Akaashi Keiji, same sport and highschool as bokuto 

#actualthug: Hazuki Nagisa, and I swim on the Iwatobi swim club!(*＾ワ＾*)

Zettairyoiki: Nishinoya Yuu, the libero for Karasuno!

iswearimnotathugitsjustmyface: Azumane Asahi, and I play on Karasuno's volleyball team. Nice to meet everyone!

Zettairyoiki: He's the ace of our team!!

iswearimnotathugitsjustmyface: Noya...

Zettairyoiki: i gotta talk good about the bae tho u cant stop me

teammom: Sugawara Koushi, and I do volleyball at Karasuno as well!

SousuketheBuff: Yamazaki Sousuke, and I swim on Samezuka Academy's team

Katsuki_Yuuri: What's this?

Katsuki_Yuuri: Oh, I see. My name is Katsuki Yuuri, and I do figure skating! My spouse Viktor isn't on right now, but they wanted me to introduce them too, so their username is number1skatingmom.

freethemermaid2k17: nanase haruka, iwatobi swim club

_Private Message between: PhiSHIT, BeautifulButterfly_

BeautifulButterfly: PHICHIT YOU DID NOT TELL ME YOU KNEW KATSUKI YUURI

PhiSHIT: ohoho a fan are we

_Group chat_

BeautifulButterfly: I am Ryugazaki Rei, and I swim with Makoto senpai, Haruka senpai, and Nagisa.

#actualthug: awe i don't get to be senpai (´∩｀。) 

BeautifulButterfly: I'm older?

#actualthug: i beg to differ 

#actualthug: i was born august 

#actualthug: you were born december

Mamakoto: I know both your birthdays and yet I never put that together 

BeautifulButterfly: ... Nagisa senpai?

#actualthug: nvm that doesn't make me sound cute i like chan better ( ´ ▽ ` )b

BeautifulButterfly: Alright then.

KuBRO: Kuroo Tetsurou, on Nekoma's volleyball team

PhiSHIT: Once everyone else comes on later they can introduce themselves <3

TOSSTOME: *inhale*

Zettairyoiki: brace yourselves everyone 

TOSSTOME: HELLO MY NAME IS HINATA SHOUYO IM 16 YEARS OLD IM A BOY AND MY FAVOURITE FOOD IS MEAT BUNS BUT IM CELIAC SO I CAN ONLY HAVE SPECIAL MEAT BUNS FROM COACH UKAI'S STORE I LIKE PLAYING VOLLEYBALL AND I DISLIKE BEING SHORT AND I PLAY ON KARASUNO'S VOLLEYBALL TEAM

#actualthug: did you breathe at all while typin that???

BeautifulButterfly: Nagisa, he wouldn't have needed to. He's typing.

#actualthug: reichan i kno *pat pat*

SmolChickenNuggetSon: I HATE BEING SHORT TOO CAN WE BE FRIENDS

TOSSTOME: :OOO YESSS

Zettairyoiki: start a fuckin club guys I'm joining 

Zettairyoiki: *heckin

teammom: Language!

teammom: thank you

Zettairyoiki: <333

Zettairyoiki: pls dont hide the volleyballs on the top shelf ):

PhiSHIT: how short is short 

SmolChickenNuggetSon: um

TOSSTOME: if you're shorter than kenma you're short

PokemonMaster: did someone say my name

TOSSTOME: kenma!!!! How tall are you!!!!

PokemonMaster: ....

PokemonMaster: 5'5/169 cm

Zettairyoiki: Takeda sensei can join the short club! A-AND KIYOKOCHAN *swoons*

respectyourelders: KIYOKOCHAAAAN

respectyourelders: wait I'm not short enough to be in this club this sucks

#actualthug: so as far as we kno nishinoya, phichit, me, this takeda guy, kenma, and hinata make up the short people club!!

WinterTiger: I hate it but then I do too

TheRealOtabek: you're not the only skater in the short club Yura. Leo, Guang-Hong, Minami, Phichit and I all qualify for the short person club.

TheRealOtabek: I'm Otabek Altin, for those of who I'm just meeting.

teamdad: Is anyone else seeing these really famous names and getting just a little bit intimidated??

Katsuki_Yuuri: Please don't be! 

respectyourelders: daichi you follow skating???

teamdad: well, duh

teamdad: blame your mother

teammom: I had nothing to do with this, it was on the tv once!

MilkKeg09: what is this

TOSSTOME: KAGEYAAAAMAAAA

MilkKeg09 has left the group chat

teammom has added MilkKeg09 to the group chat

MilkKeg09: ??????

teammom: no leaving 

MilkKeg09 has left the conversation

TOSSTOME has added: MilkKeg09

MilkKeg09 has left the conversation

teamdad has added: MilkKeg09

teamdad: No son

MillKeg09: i have school in seven hours. If i can't leave, tell me how to mute the chat.

#actualthug: i pmd u the deets man

#actualthug: or woman

#actualthug: human

MilkKeg09: man

#actualthug: alrightie~

MamaKoto: my newly adopted child, why aren't you asleep??

MilkKeg09: can't sleep

TOSSTOME: im comin over

MilkKeg09: the window's open

respectyourelders: it's like Romeo and Juliet up in here

Zettairyoiki: who's romeo and who's juliet?

believeinouralienoverlord: hinata is visiting tobio, so obviously hinata is romeo

CrispyTwinSara: stereotyping the one in distress as the female, tsk tsk

CrispyTwinSara: i kid, i kid

CrispyTwinSara: sup fam im sara crispino, the one with a name similar to mine is my brother michele

BROkuto: how similar are we talking 

CrispyTwinMichele: I'm going to go ahead and assume this is the group chat Chulanont was talking about making?

BROkuto: oh okay so pretty similar 

TOSSTOME: does anyone know how to make hot chocolate

Katsuki_Yuuri: If it's for your friend, warm milk would be better. Chocolate contains caffeine, and will keep him awake. Add ground cinnamon, honey, or vanilla/almond extract to flavour it!

TOSSTOME: !!!! Thank !!!

teammom: please don't set Kageyama's kitchen on fire 

Zettairyoiki: should we have sent someone to his house with Hinata so there wouldn't be any kitchen accidents???

TOSSTOME: omg i'm fine guys i'm not going to set anything on fire 

TOSSTOME: hypothetically, are you supposed to use salt or baking powder on a grease fire 

respectyourelders: HOW DO YOU SET A GREASE FIRE MAKING HOT CHOCOLATE???

freethemermaid2k17: salt for a grease fire, never water. cover it with a pan/lid to remove oxygen and extinguish the flame 

SharkJesus: of course Haru would know how to extinguish a grease fire...

TOSSTOME: it's out, all good fam

TOSSTOME: to answer your question, there was a frying pan with bacon grease in it sitting on the stove. i bumped it and it spilled onto the open element.

WinterTiger: how did you know it was bacon grease

CrispyTwinSara: now were askin the real questions 

TOSSTOME: it smelled like bacon???

MilkKeg09: Hinata, why does it smell like smoke

CrispyTwinSara: scroll up

TOSSTOME: DONT SCROLL UP

MilkKeg09: oh

MilkKeg09: should I be trying to get out of the house right now or

TOSSTOME: don't move i'm bringin milk 

MilkKeg09: I feel like you're trying to bribe me

TOSSTOME: i would never :o

#actualthug: why is everyone who is supposed to be asleep awake right now (´･ω･`)? 

teammom: no comment 

teamdad: no comment

Zettairyoiki: ew

imnotathugiswearitsjustmyface: Studying for a test tomorrow 

Zettairyoiki: DO GOOD BAE

imnotathugiswearitsjustmyface: Noya, don't you have a test as well??

Zettairyoiki: oh

PhiSHIT: I relate to the panic in that simple 'oh' on a painful level

Zettairyoiki: IM SCREWED

Zettairyoiki: im just gonna become a simple sheepherder in Iceland who's with me

respectyourelders: Do they have volleyball in Iceland??

KuBRO: of course they have volleyball in Iceland they're not heathens 

respectyourelders: I'm joining you Noya 

Zettairyoiki: bro <33

respectyourelders: <333

KuBRO: brooomance

#actualthug: NOTHIN REALLY GAY ABOUT IT

tinychihuahua: NOT THAT THERES ANYTHING WRONG WITH BEIN GAY

believeinouralienoverlord: BROOOMANCE

PhiSHIT: SHOULDNT BE ASHAMED OR HIDE IT

SharkJesus: I LOVE YOU

respectyourelders: IN THE MOST HETROSEXUAL WAY

#actualthug: i will admit i've always wanted to do that

BROkuto: I MISSED IT NOO

KuBRO: bro,,,, it was our song,,,

BROkuto: bro,,,,,,, im so sorry,,,,,,,

KuuBRO: /p>

number1skatingmom: what'd i miss i was busy cuddling my dog

TOSSTOME: omg pictures of the doggo please

number1skatingmom: [Image: Makkachin, curled up underneath a blanket emblazoned with Yuuri's face. Viktor is lying behind Makkachin and posing with one leg in the air.]

TOSSTOME: is that katsuki yuuri on the blanket i swear i have the exact same one

KuuBRO: is

KuuBRO: is he going to notice?

Zettairyoiki: it remains a mystery

TOSSTOME: notice what??

TOSSTOME: AKFJSGGAFHK WAIT UOURE VIOR NOKFORT

TOSSTOME: **VIKTOR NIKIFOROV

number1skatingmom has changed their name to: itsmeViorNokfort

itsmeViorNokfort: yep

TOSSTOME: W A IT

TOSSTOME: Katsuki_Yuuri _IS_ ACTUALLY KATSUKI YUURI???

TOSSTOME: I DINT THINK I WOULD BE MEETIN MY TWOFSVOURITE SPORTS PEOPLE TODAY SKDHABSHJ I JUST

MilkKeg09: he's actually freaking out right now

TOSSTOME: LIKE IF U TOLD ME YESTERDAY 'HINATA UR GONNA B MEETIN VIKTOT NIKIFOROV TODAY AND KATSUKI YUURI TOO' I'D BE??? VIKTOR, HES REALLY FAMOUS???? AND YUURI TOO????????

itsmeViorNokfort: *they

TOSSTOME: oh sorry!! D:: *they're really famous

itsmeViorNokfort: np

Katsuki_Yuuri: what's happening? Viktor just started laughing really hard??

Katsuki_Yuuri: sorry for startling you, Hinata!

TOSSTOME: AHH

SmolChickenNuggetSon: I FEEL THE SAME WAY EVERYTIME I GET TO COMPETE WITH HIM <333

TOSSTOME: omg omg omg another katsuki yuuri fan lets start a club

PhiSHIT: SIGN ME UP

itsmeViorNokfort: as his spouse i feel entitled to the title of president 

TOSSTOME: YES YES

BeautifulButterfly: ... I would also like to join?

itsmeViorNokfort: im starting another group brb

Katsuki_Yuuri: Oh my god

ActualGoddess: don't worry, it gets less weird after a bit. Tanaka and Noya still have my fan club up and running.

respectyourelders: 22 members and counting, Kiyokochan!

Zettairyoiki: the ceremonial flames still burn brightly for our goddess 

ActualGoddess: ... You didn't keep that shrine up in the boiler room after I told you to take it down, did you?

Zettairyoiki: um

Zettairyoiki: tanaka tanaka tanaka bro take it fuckin down the goddess will get angry

respectyourelders: this isn't pm bro

Zettairyoiki: OH NO

ActualGoddess: It better he gone by practice tomorrow, I'm going to check. 

Zettairyoiki: YES'M

respectyourelders: YES MAM

IsabellaYang26: Oh wow another group chat

#actualthug: I sense you are a human of many group chats

IsabellaYang26: Just two, actually. I don't really talk to a whole lot of people 

IsabellaYang26: Well, now I do, I guess

teamdad: alright my kiddos as team dad I declare it bed time if you're tired at practice tomorrow I will make you do suicide runs

Zettairyoiki: so cruel, Dadchi!!!!

Mamakoto: Nagisa, Haru, Rei, I have to agree with them on this. Bedtime.

#actualthug: but what's the water equivalent of suicide runs

Mamakoto: suicide laps

freethemermaid2k17: i'm going to stay up all night if it means more water time 

Mamakoto: You're not going to get into the pool if you're not in bed within ten minutes, Haru

freethemermaid2k17: good night everyone 

believeinouralienoverlord has added: Hanakawa03, Matsumaki02

believeinouralienoverlord: go to bed

Hanakawa03: did you really just add us to send us to bed??

believeinouralienoverlord: are you disobeying me

Matsumaki02: yeah, we're busy

believeinouralienoverlord: oh mkay have fun

believeinouralienoverlord: use protection

Hanakawa03: JESUS

believeinouralienoverlord: close but no

teammom: I beseech of thee, there are children in this chat

believeinouralienoverlord: mr refreshing 

believeinouralienoverlord: none of them are awake

TOSSTOME: i am

teammom: go to sleep

TOSSTOME: no i'm making sure Kageyama is getting sleep

TOSSTOME: oh he's asleep now, k i'm off!!!! night guys


	2. Chapter 2

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> hello its me your local garbage bin
> 
> so so exciting news update of the week i don't need parental consent to get testosterone where i live y'all!! as soon as i get a decent job i'm gettin me some of that
> 
>  
> 
> Katsuki_Yuuri: Yuuri  
> Number1skatingmom/itsmeViorNokfort: Viktor  
> WinterTiger: Yuri  
> TheRealOtabek: Otabek  
> Kingkongpingpong: Guang-Hong  
> CrispytwinSara: Sara  
> CrispytwinMichele: Michele  
> Seung_Gil: Seung-Gil  
> Sexyandiknowit: Christophe  
> JJ-style: Jean-Jacques  
> IsabellaYang26: Isabella  
> SmolChickenNuggetSon: Minami  
> BasicallyNatashaRomanoff: Mila  
> NotPewdiepieK: Emil  
> Georgi Popovich: Georgi
> 
> Mamakoto: Makoto  
> BeautifulButterfly: Rei  
> freethemermaid2k17: Haru  
> #actualthug: Nagisa  
> NOTMYNAME: Gou
> 
> STAGBEETLESTHO: Momotarou  
> sharkjesus: Rin  
> SousuketheBuff: Sousuke  
> thesmollestswimmer: Nitori
> 
> TOSSTOME: Hinata  
> MilkKeg09: Kageyama  
> teammom/BETRAYED: Suga  
> teamdad: Daichi  
> zettairyoiki: Noya  
> tinychihuahua: Yachi  
> respectyourelders: Tanaka  
> Yamagoodshit: Yamaguchi  
> thelastdinosaur: Tukishima  
> En-NoShit-a: Ennoshita  
> ActualGoddess: Kiyoko  
> iswearimnotathugitsjustmyface: Asahi
> 
> BROkuto: Bokuto  
> Akaaexcuseme: Akaashi
> 
> KuBRO: Kuroo  
> PokemonMaster: Kenma  
> RussianLion: Lev
> 
> OikawaNo: Iwaizumi  
> believeinouralienoverlord: Oikawa  
> Hanakawa03: Hanamaki  
> Matsumaki02: Matsukawa

BROkuto: GOD FUCKING DAMN IT OKAY

BROkuto: I KINDA DIDNT WANT TK SAY ANYTBING BEFORE AND IM MAKIN MISTAKES INT YPING YO CAN SEE IM WORKED UP ABT THD

BROkuto: AND I KNO IM A DUCKIN LOSER DOING THIS VER TEXT BUT WE HARDLY SEE EACHOTHER IRL EXCEPT FOR PRACTICE SO

BROkuto: I REALLY LIKE LIKE YOU LIKE FUCK KUROO

BROkuto: LIKE DAMN UO WERE MY BRO BUT I WANT TO BE MORE THAN BROS BRO

BROkuto: AND IF U DONT LIKE ME BACK THAT S OKAY I WLL BE SAD YES BUT WE CAN GO BACK TO BEIN BROS IF YUO DONT LIKE ME

BROkuto: AND IF YOU DO LIKE ME THEN HOLY SHIT THIS WORKED OUT WELL

BROkuto: this isn't pm is it 

BROkuto: oh my goD i'm going to go drown myself in the river b Y E

BROkuto has left the conversation

#actualthug: that was beautiful 

#actualthug: kuroo whoever you may be if youre in here id go after them before they make it to that river

KuBRO: what

KuBRO: oh

KuBRO: oH

Akaaexcuseme: I'll go find him

teamdad: this reminds me of when Noya and Asahi started dating 

teamdad: noya basically ran into the gym and screamed 'ASAHI I LOVE YOU' not expecting anyone else but Asahi to be there so early 

teamdad: Asahi looked like he was going to die right them and there, either of embarrassment or happiness 

imnotathugiswearitsjustmyface: please don't remind me

Zettairyoiki: omg our relationship origin story

KuBRO: akaashi find him Im driving up to see him

teammom: is there anyone who can go with this distraught man so he won't drive off the road

PokemonMaster: i am

PokemonMaster: involuntarily 

PokemonMaster: i was rudely awoken and thrown into a vehicle 

KuBRO: you weren't sleeping you were playing videos games

MamaKoto: the mother in me is worried please take Kuroo's phone away Pokemon

PokemonMaster: on it

believeinouralienoverlord: change his passwords or take an unflattering picture of his and set it as his lock screen

TheRealOtabek: Do both

thesmollestswimmer: mean!!

BasicallyNatashaRomanoff: Send weird texts to all his contacts 

KuBRO: did it

PokemonMaster: oh wrong phone

itsmeViorNokfort: i eagerly await the ending of this drama

itsmeViorNokfort: will it end in romance??? heartbreak??? 

itsmeViorNokfort: tune in in however many hours it takes for Kuroo to drive up to where BROkuto lives

PokemonMaster: like two hours at his current speed

teammom: we don't need any dead volleyball players stay safe

PokemonMaster: yes mom2

thelastdinosaur: Who knows, it may make an improvement to their team.

teammom: saVAGE

BasicallyNatashaRomanoff: Omgg

teammom: go to ur room kei don't talk that way about ur family

thelastdinosaur: [image: Yamaguchi, sitting at a booth in a cafe and sipping on the straw of a milkshake]

thelastdinosaur: Can't.

teammom: AWW YOU'RE ON A DATE don't stay out too late and call if you need a ride 

YamaGoodShit: alright <33

Zettairyoiki: I like how neither of them deny that it's a date

thelastdinosaur: ?

teammom: ikr the ship is real

YamaGoodShit: Uh, guys

Zettairyoiki: what

YamaGoodShit: You know we ARE dating, right

teamdad: WHEN DID THIS HAPPEN

respectyourelders: WAIT WHAAAAT

ActualGoddess: You guys didn't know?

tinychihuahua: even I guessed it omg

teammom: ENNOSHITA TELL ME YOU DIDNT ONOW EITER 

En-NoShit-A: I did.

teammom: Asffjdjhagd

teammom: I THOUGHT I COULD TRUST U

thelastdinosaur: We have literally been dating since we were twelve. 

teammom: BETRAYAL OF THE HIGEST FORM

SmolChickenNuggetSon: Awww that's so sweet!!

BasicallyNatashaRomanoff: I hardly know you two and I already ship it so hard

teammom: MY ONLY RESPONSIBLE CHILD

teamdad: you guys have literally broken suga 

teammom: ASFAFKAGGLD

teammom has changed their name to: BETRAYED

SousuketheBuff: I'm just sitting here with popcorn watching this play out

BETRAYED: how can i ever trust anyone again

TOSSTOME: mom you can trust me!! I told you and dad when me and Kageyama were dating!

BETRAYED: that u did son <33

PhiSHIT has changed the group name to: sports homos

LeoTheMan: every single group chat I'm in is gay

LeoTheMan: this is great 

Zettairyoiki: how many homos do we have

STAGBEETLESTHO: 3 potato 

PokemonMaster: ^^^

#actualthug: 3 inches of homo

kingkongpingpong: accurate measurements here folks 

RussianLion: 4 swimming pools of homo

freethemermaid2k17: did someone say swimming 

Akaaexcuseme: Bokuto has been stopped from drowning himself in the river. He was just sitting on the bank and poking at an ant with a stick

Akaaexcuseme: he's now curled up on my couch and is proclaiming that his end is near.

Akaaexcuseme: Kuroo, he leaves you the mysterious orange box underneath his bed 

Akaaexcuseme: Tsukishima, he leaves you his favourite volleyball

thelastdinosaur: when did I get put into his will wtf 

PokemonMaster: Kuroo says, and I quote: "Bokuto I'm going to be there in fucking five minutes chill your tits"

Akaaexcuseme: He's now loudly protesting that he doesn't have any proper tits to chill

Katsuki_Yuuri: LAANGUAGE KHAGSKGLA

WinterTiger: fuck

Katsuki_Yuuri has removed: WinterTiger

CrispyTwinSara: frick

Katsuki_Yuuri has removed: CrispyTwinSara

TOSSTOME: fudge

Katsuki_Yuuri has removed: TOSSTOME

PhiSHIT: anyone else wanna fckin go

Katsuki_Yuuri has removed: PhiSHIT

NotPewdiepieK: it's the purge 

MilkKeg09 has added: TOSSTOME

TOSSTOME: thanku bae <3

Akaaexcuseme: [Image: Bokuto, lying on a couch with an arm thrown dramatically over his eyes and a tub of icecream sitting on his chest]

Akaaexcuseme: Your request is the last one he will fulfil, Kuroo

PokemonMaster: "jesus christ you drama queen"

PokemonMaster: "is that rocky road icecream??? He better not be letting it go to waste"

sexyandiknowit: I'm with Kuroo on that

Akaaexcuseme has added: BROkuto

BROkuto: it's really cold dont put icecream on ur nips kids

BROkuto: i would neVER im eatin it now 

MilkKeg09 has added: CrispyTwinSara, PhiSHIT, WinterTiger

CrispyTwinSara: bless u son

CrispyTwinSara: a true saint right here 

respectyourelders: the only true saint is meat okay

Zettairyoiki: MEATY MEAT, MEAT, MEATY MEAT

TOSSTOME: PUT EM TOGETHER YOU GET MEAT AND MEAT

respectyourelders:MEATY MEAT, MEAT! HOORAY FOR MEST, ENERGY TIMES A HUNDRED!

MilkKeg09: Hallelujah, hallelujah

TOSSTOME: MEAT IS GOD

respectyourelders: MEAT IS GOD

Zettairyoiki: MEAT IS GOD 

SousuketheBuff: wtf

itsmeViorNokfort: all hail the meat cult 

MilkKeg09: meat is love meat is life


	3. Chapter 3

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Katsuki_Yuuri: Yuuri  
> itsmeViorNokfort: Viktor  
> WinterTiger: Yuri  
> TheRealOtabek: Otabek  
> Kingkongpingpong: Guang-Hong  
> CrispytwinSara: Sara  
> CrispytwinMichele: Michele  
> Seung_Gil: Seung-Gil  
> Sexyandiknowit: Christophe  
> JJ-style: Jean-Jacques  
> IsabellaYang26: Isabella  
> SmolChickenNuggetSon: Minami  
> BasicallyNatashaRomanoff: Mila  
> NotPewdiepieK: Emil  
> Georgi Popovich: Georgi
> 
> Mamakoto: Makoto  
> BeautifulButterfly: Rei  
> freethemermaid2k17/WaterOtaku:Haru  
> #actualthug: Nagisa  
> NOTMYNAME: Gou
> 
> STAGBEETLESTHO: Momotarou  
> sharkjesus: Rin  
> SousuketheBuff: Sousuke  
> thesmollestswimmer: Nitori
> 
> TOSSTOME: Hinata  
> MilkKeg09: Kageyama  
> teammom/mrrefreshingSuga  
> teamdad/DaddyMaterial™: Daichi  
> zettairyoiki: Noya  
> tinychihuahua: Yachi  
> respectyourelders: Tanaka  
> Yamagoodshit: Yamaguchi  
> thelastdinosaur: Tukishima  
> En-NoShit-a: Ennoshita  
> ActualGoddess: Kiyoko  
> iswearimnotathugitsjustmyface: Asahi
> 
> BROkuto: Bokuto  
> Akaaexcuseme: Akaashi
> 
> KuBRO: Kuroo  
> PokemonMaster: Kenma  
> RussianLion: Lev
> 
> OikawaNo: Iwaizumi  
> believeinouralienoverlord/shittykawa/prettykawa: Oikawa  
> Hanakawa03: Hanamaki  
> Matsumaki02: Matsukawa

itsmeViorNokfort: so

itsmeViorNokfort: should I try growing out my hair again or what

TOSSTOME: YESSSS

teamdad: totally 

BeautifulButterfly: I think that each hairstyle had it's own type of beauty. Your shorter cut brings about a more masculine look, but em you were younger your longer hair (and your frame at the time probably helped as well) with a more androgynous look. Either way, both suit you well.

#actualthug: if u hadn't guessed already, reichan is a p big fan of yours

itsmeViorNokfort: thank you, rei! I've been debating whether or not to grow it out for a while now. I might as well, while I still have it...

Katsuki_Yuuri: you're still upset over the fact that I poked your bald spot, aren't you

itsmeViorNokfort: its thinning not balding :(((

WinterTiger: for now

itsmeViorNokfort: Yura, so cruel

itsmeVokfort: I am hurt deeply :((((((

SmolChickenNuggetSon: someone help me

SmolChickenNuggetSon: I'm being dragged on a business trip to meet potential sponsors in idk what the town is called yukikagoawa or something 

TOSSTOME: WAIIIT WAIT WAIT WAIT

TOSSTOME: IS THAT TOWN BY CHANCE YUKIGAOKA

SmolChickenNuggetSon: lemme ask

SmolChickenNuggetSon: dad says yes

TOSSTOME: :OOOO

TOSSTOME: THATS WHERE I LIVE THO

SmolChickenNuggetSon: WAIT REALLY

TOSSTOME: YES PLS COME MEET ME HOW LONG ARE YOU STAYING

SmolChickenNuggetSon: LIKE THREE DAYS BUT OUR LAST DAY THERE IS FREE AHH

#actualthug: so guess what guys smh im bein dragged on a family vaycay to someplace called yukigaoka 

#actualthug: WHAAAASSTFJ WAIT

TOSSTOME: OMG BOTH OF U ARE GONNA B HERE 

SmolChickenNuggetSon: Nagisa what day(s) are you gonna be there????

#actualthug: from may 4th to like may 7th!!!!!!

LeoTheMan: May the 4th be with you

Zettairyoiki: ^^^

SmolChickenNuggetSon: I'm gonna be there the same weekend!!!

TOSSTOME: we could all meet up!!!!! Omg omg I'm so excited now 

#actualthug: HECK YES

teammom: If you two are staying over the weekend you should come down during practice so we can all meet you!

SmolChickenNuggetSon: YESS

#actualthug: this vacation is actually going to be the best tbh

BROkuto: heyheyhey we should do a meet up with all of us

BROkuto: like literally everyone in this chat

SmolChickenNuggetSon: I did that in my other group chat!!! It was great!! I got lost in a mansion, scared a lot of people and cried in a corner because I thought IT was coming for me 

PhiSHIT: Mila was forever scarred by #Viktuuri

BasicallyNatashaRomanoff: my innocent eyes

believeinouralienoverlord: "innocent"

BasicallyNatashaRomanoff: you've got me there

OikawaNo: you're one to talk, shittykawa

believeinouralienoverlord: iwachan pls

believeinouralienoverlord's name has been changed to: shittykawa

shittykawa: WHO DID THIS

shittykawa: Iwachan was this you 

SousuketheBuff: we can change each other's names???

shittykawa's name has been changed to: prettykawa

prettykawa: <33

teammom's name has been changed to: mrrefreshing

freethemermaid's name has been changed to: WaterOtaku

WaterOtaku: accurate 

mrrefreshing: who

teamdad: no flirting with my husband ):

teamdad's name has been changed to: DaddyMaterial™

DaddyMaterial™: WHO

mrrefreshing: choke me daddy

Akaaexcuseme: oh my god

sexyandiknowit: ;;;;;0

MakaKoto: THERE ARE CHildREn

TOSSTOME: but of course Daichi is daddy material??

PhiSHIT: IM WHEEZING ASDFJLJKS

TOSSTOME: he takes care of all of us, if he and Suga ever get married and adopt kids he's going to be a really good dad 

Georgi Popovich: So sweet, so innocent 

sharkjesus: never change small human 

SousuketheBuff: *smol

sharkjesus: bite me 

SousuketheBuff: ( ͡° ͜ʖ ͡°)

STAGBEETLESTHO: MOM DAD NO

prettykawa: so shouyo you do know what daddy means in this situation right

TOSSTOME: no?

prettykawa: well

mrrefreshing: Don't you dare I will fuck your shit up

JJ-style: PROTECT HIS INNOCENCE 

KuBRO: #protecthinatashouyosquad

CrispyTwinSara: PROTECT THE INNOCENT BEAN

prettykawa: omg omg okay

mrrefreshing: good

prettykawa: basically, it's a thing where some people feel like being an adult is their role playing and they can come home to their 'caregiver' and just play with the stuffies and blow all the bubbles without fear of judgement. The 'daddy' or 'mommy' in this role can then nurture their 'little' also without fear of judgement. It's not always a sexual thing, tho it is often

mrrefreshing: OIKAWA

mrrefreshing: oh wait you didnt go where I thought you were going with that okay

prettykawa: he asked an honest question, and i answered it

prettykawa: however, in the situation above it was definitely meant as a sexual thing

TOSSTOME: I'm still confused

DaddyMaterial™: it's okay son you're young you have no need for kinks at this point in your life

TOSSTOME: what's a kink

sharkjesus: MOVING ON

IsabellaYang26: who else is salty over the fact that yesterday was Easter

IsabellaYang26: and we still have no pre-Easter voltron content

BeautifulButterfly: I am

PokemonMaster: did someone say voltron

PokemonMaster: i definitely am

IsabellaYang26: grab your pitchforks and torches, we riot at dawn

Mamakoto: Rei you watch Voltron???? Send me your headcanons and ships!!!

#actualthug: what's voltron 

Mamakoto: omg

BeautifulButterfly: No boyfriend of mine will go without watching Voltron

BeautifulButterfly: Pack an overnight bag, Nagisa. We're binge watching it tonight.

Mamakoto: Make sure he ships the right ships, Rei

TOSSTOME: so, I looked up what kinks meant 

MilkKeg09: He did it at my house

MilkKeg09: On my computer

MilkKeg09: Daichi can you come and explain why Hinata was looking up what kinks meant to my dad

DaddyMaterial™: oops

mrrefreshing: I'll go, your father trusts me more than Daichi

MilkKeg09: okay

MilkKeg09: please hurry, my father looks like he's going to explode 

TOSSTOME: and I'm pretty sure he's calling my mom

mrrefreshing: no body talk for a while, I have a feeling I'll need the group chat for evidence and I don't feel like scrolling back up a whole lot

IsabellaYang26: let us know when the coast is clear to come back on!


	4. Chapter 4

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> THIS IS LATE i meant for this to be out on thursday may 4th so just go back in time and read it then yeah
> 
> dumBLEDORE
> 
> if u feel like someone would be sorted differently come debate with me about it in the chat i won't mind and love talking with you guys <33
> 
>  
> 
> Katsuki_Yuuri: Yuuri  
> itsmeViorNokfort: Viktor  
> WinterTiger: Yuri  
> TheRealOtabek: Otabek  
> Kingkongpingpong: Guang-Hong  
> CrispytwinSara: Sara  
> CrispytwinMichele: Michele  
> Seung_Gil: Seung-Gil  
> Sexyandiknowit: Christophe  
> JJ-style: Jean-Jacques  
> IsabellaYang26: Isabella  
> SmolChickenNuggetSon: Minami  
> BasicallyNatashaRomanoff: Mila  
> NotPewdiepieK: Emil  
> Georgi Popovich: Georgi
> 
> Mamakoto: Makoto  
> BeautifulButterfly: Rei  
> WaterOtaku:Haru  
> #actualthug: Nagisa  
> NOTMYNAME: Gou
> 
> STAGBEETLESTHO: Momotarou  
> sharkjesus: Rin  
> SousuketheBuff: Sousuke  
> thesmollestswimmer: Nitori
> 
> TOSSTOME: Hinata  
> MilkKeg09: Kageyama  
> mrrefreshingSuga  
> DaddyMaterial™: Daichi  
> zettairyoiki: Noya  
> tinychihuahua: Yachi  
> respectyourelders: Tanaka  
> Yamagoodshit: Yamaguchi  
> thelastdinosaur: Tukishima  
> En-NoShit-a: Ennoshita  
> ActualGoddess: Kiyoko  
> iswearimnotathugitsjustmyface: Asahi
> 
> BROkuto: Bokuto  
> Akaaexcuseme: Akaashi
> 
> KuBRO: Kuroo  
> PokemonMaster: Kenma  
> RussianLion: Lev  
> fightme: Yaku
> 
> OikawaNo: Iwaizumi  
> prettykawa: Oikawa  
> Hanakawa03: Hanamaki  
> Matsumaki02: Matsukawa
> 
> also update about my life i'm learning to drive a stick shift car right now it's actually fun. but if it were an actual test i would have failed miserably i actually forgot to put my seatbelt on rip

SmolChickenNuggetSon: omg omg omg guys im driving down to meet hinata and nagisa rn im so exCITED

#actualthug: IM DRIVIN DOWN TOO THIS IS GOING TO BE GREAT

TOSSTOME: ! I CAN'T WAIT TO MEET YOU GUYSSSS

zettaryoiki: wait wait wait

zettaryoiki: SmolChicken how tall r u

SmolChickenNuggetSon: 155cm/5'1

TOSSTOME: omg noya

zettaryoiki: I

zettaryoiki: i never thought i'd finally meet another dude who was shorter than me

SmolChickenNuggetSon: I GET TO KEEP THE TITLE OF SHORTEST PERSON YES

tinychihuahua: I'm actually 4'10, so...

SmolChickenNuggetSon: smallest male is good enough for me

SmolChickenNuggetSon: wait i'm assuming you're female are you not if not i'm sorry

tinychihuahua: No, no it's okay! I am a girl.

CrispyTwinMichele: Can I make a really overused joke

sharkjesus: oh my god

CrispyTwinMichele: did you just assume tinychihuahua's gender

SmolChickenNuggetSon: )):

tinychihuahua: It's okay!

mrrefreshing: Hinata, Kageyama, did you study for your test this friday

TOSSTOME: uh

MilkKeg09: In my defense

TOSSTOME: im screwED

MilkKeg09: I was doing a lot of volleyball practice

TOSSTOME: MY PARENTS ARE GOING TO KILL ME

MilkKeg09: And I had to perfect my set

TOSSTOME: IM GOING TO BE BANISHED TO MY ROOM FOR YEARS

MilkKeg09: and there was a lot more important things going on that weren't studying for english

TOSSTOME: A:KLDJG:KHJLF|

MilkKeg09: so that's my explanation

TOSSTOME: TOBIO WERE GONNA FAIL

tinychihuahua: I have a test I have to be studying for as well, so I can't help you study...

#actualthug: yo yo dudes im p good at english i can help you guys study while im there on the thursday

TOSSTOME: BLESS U NAGISA

MilkKeg09: please help us

sexyandiknowit: help them obiwan kenobi you're their only hope

#actualthug: pm me so ik what to prep for

TOSSTOME: Okay! I'll add tobio n you to a new chat to figure that out

Mamakoto: So, how is everyone doing today?

Katsuki_Yuuri: I've been pretty good! How about you?

Mamakoto: I've been pretty good as well!

PhiSHIT: this is like watching mothers interact

thesmollestswimmer: no no it IS watching mothers interact, we are all the children

PokemonMaster: can confirm am children

RussianLion has added: fightme

fightme: what is this

RussianLion: It's a group chat!

fightme: why?

RussianLion: To talk to people?

fightme: i mother nekoma is that not enough

fightme: fight me

WaterOtaku: true to their name

KuBRO: introduce yourself

fightme has left the group chat

RussianLion has added: fightme

KuBRO: as your captain I order you to introduce yourself

fightme: my name is yaku morisuke and i'm 6'5

RussianLion: No you're not

fightme: shut up

RussianLion: Yaku's tiny! He's actually 5'5.

tinychihuahua: If it makes you feel better Yaku, I'm 4'10!

zettaryoiki: I'M 5'3

PhiSHIT: basically there's a lot of people the same height or shorter so you shouldn't feel too poorly about your height 33 ik some people who'd love to be as tall as you are

SmolChickenNuggetSon: yall who here knows that needle fear yet hormones are still A V Important Thing™

ActualGoddess: Needle fear was real, switched to oral tablets.

Yamagoodshit: needles are scary... probably going to go either the patch or gel route, honestly.

WinterTiger: quick question is it like

WinterTiger: is it normal to be casually and openly trans even among friends

WinterTiger: not to sound ignorant but in my case it's never really been something to be open about

ActualGoddess: Well, it depends on you as a person. Some people are comfortable with being open and vocal about it, and others wish that they could just hide their biological sex and live as their true gender. If you're more comfortable being stealth (meaning you prefer to be perceived as cis and not trans), then that's what you're comfortable with. It's your body, and your gender.

WinterTiger: alright

iswearimnotathugitsjustmyface: Some people might be more comfortable talking about it than others. It's all your choice, however.

itsmeViorNokfort: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Tx1XIm6q4r4

Hanakawa03: HMMM

Hanakawa03: WHAT IS THAT MYSTERIOUS TICKING NOISE

DaddyMaterial™: Not over here, not over there, hmm...

OikawaNo: Kinda of... catchy.

JJ-style: Snape, Snape. Severus Snape, Snape, Snape. Severus Snape.

STAGBEETLESTHO: DUMBLEDORE

respectyourelders: snape, snape, severus snape

PhiSHIT: DUMBLEDORE

NOTMYNAME: Snape, snape, severus snape DUMBLEDORE

Seung_Gil: snape

TheRealOtabek: ron,

Seung_Gil: snape

TheRealOtabek: ron,

Seung_Gil: Severus snape

TheRealOtabek: Ron Weasley!

WinterTiger: you too beka jesus christ

WinterTiger: fine dumbledore

En-NoShit-a HEEEERRRMIONE

WaterOtaku: snape

sharkjesus: harry

WaterOtaku: snapE

sharkjesus: harRY

WaterOtaku: SNAPE

sharkjesus: HARRY

WaterOtaku: SNAPE

sharkjesus: HARRY

tinychihuahua: dumbledore?

Akaaexcuseme: herrrrrrmione

RussianLion: Singing a song, all day long at Hoooogwarts!

Katsuki_Yuuri: What's everyone's hogwarts houses? Mine is Hufflepuff!

WaterOtaku: ravenclaw

#actualthug: slytherin yo

SmolChickenNuggetSon: Hufflepuff!

itsmeViorNokfort: Slytherin <33

mrrefreshing: slytherin!

BROkuto: Hufflepuff!

zettairyoiki: GRYFFINDORR

iswearimnotathugitsjustmyface: Hufflepuff

STAGBEETLESTHO: MY GRYFFINDOR PEEPS

thesmollestswimmer: ravenclaw!

En-NoShit-a: Ravenclaw!

Seung_Gil: Ravenclaw.

tinychihuahua: Ravenclaw... there's so many of us!

fightme: gryffindor.

RussianLion: Hufflepuff!

Akaaexcuseme: Ravenclaw

KuBRO: Slytherin!

Mamakoto: Hufflepuff!

BeautifulButterfly: Ravenclaw.

sharkjesus: slytherin

TOSSTOME: NAGISA I SEE YOU

TOSSTOME: WAIT HARRY POTTER YES IM GRYFFINDOR

#actualthug: WAIT WHERE

TOSSTOME: LIKE TO UR LEFT

#actualthug: AHH

mrrefreshing: [Image: Nagisa and Hinata, in the midst of a flying tackle hug]

TOSSTOME: SUGA WAIT WHERE RU

mrrefreshing: i'll never reveal my secrets

#actualthug: MINAMI HOW FAR AWAY ARE YOU

SmolChickenNuggetSon: STILL LIKE AN HOUR AND A HALF )::

#actualthug: JESUS FUCK HINATA CAN JUMP HIGH

mrrefreshing: LANGUAGE CHILDREN

mrrefreshing: [Image: Hinata performing his 'Spider-man jump' so Nagisa can see how high he jumps]

CrispyTwinSara: SON THAT'S LIKE 6 FEET

DaddyMaterial™: yep

SmolChickenNuggetSon: YOU COULD JUMP OVER ME WHILE I'M STANDING

mrrefreshing: that's right

thelastdinosaur: It's a shame he isn't as tall as he can jump.

TOSSTOME: FIGHT ME STINGYSHIMA

yamagoodshit: omg tsukki

Mamakoto: children play nice now


	5. Chapter 5

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> hello yall
> 
> adulting is scary don't do it kids
> 
>  
> 
> Katsuki_Yuuri: Yuuri  
> itsmeViorNokfort: Viktor  
> WinterTiger: Yuri  
> TheRealOtabek: Otabek  
> Kingkongpingpong: Guang-Hong  
> CrispytwinSara: Sara  
> CrispytwinMichele: Michele  
> Seung_Gil: Seung-Gil  
> Sexyandiknowit: Christophe  
> JJ-style: Jean-Jacques  
> IsabellaYang26: Isabella  
> SmolChickenNuggetSon: Minami  
> BasicallyNatashaRomanoff: Mila  
> NotPewdiepieK: Emil  
> Georgi Popovich: Georgi
> 
> Mamakoto: Makoto  
> BeautifulButterfly: Rei  
> WaterOtaku:Haru  
> #actualthug: Nagisa  
> NOTMYNAME: Gou
> 
> STAGBEETLESTHO: Momotarou  
> sharkjesus: Rin  
> SousuketheBuff: Sousuke  
> thesmollestswimmer: Nitori
> 
> TOSSTOME: Hinata  
> MilkKeg09: Kageyama  
> mrrefreshingSuga  
> DaddyMaterial™: Daichi  
> zettairyoiki: Noya  
> tinychihuahua: Yachi  
> respectyourelders: Tanaka  
> Yamagoodshit: Yamaguchi  
> thelastdinosaur: Tukishima  
> En-NoShit-a: Ennoshita  
> ActualGoddess: Kiyoko  
> iswearimnotathugitsjustmyface: Asahi
> 
> BROkuto: Bokuto  
> Akaaexcuseme: Akaashi
> 
> KuBRO: Kuroo  
> PokemonMaster: Kenma  
> RussianLion: Lev
> 
> OikawaNo: Iwaizumi  
> prettykawa: Oikawa  
> Hanakawa03: Hanamaki  
> Matsumaki02: Matsukawa

MilkKeg09: Hello, what is this?

mrrefreshing: ? kageyama?

MilkKeg09: No, this is her mother.

mrrefreshing: oh hello mrs kageyama! i'm suga, from the volleyball team!

PhiSHIT: Hello Mrs. Kageyama! I'm Phichit Chulanont! This is a group chat I made for everyone I know to interact! So we have a swim team from Iwatobi, the members of the Karasuno volleyball team, some people from the Aoba Johsai team, some people from Nekoma, some people from Fukurodani, and a handful of international figure skaters! Kageyama is friends with Hinata, so I added Kageyama to this chat alongside with him.

MilkKeg09: And what happens in this chat?

BROkuto: the occasional memery, accidentally confessing your love to people in public chat and not pm, discourse over whether Harry Potter was a biased narrator or not, as is the drill for usual group chats

zettairyoiki: many many memes

Mamakoto: Lots of friendship and happiness

tinychihuahua: Oh hello Mrs. Kageyama! I'm Yachi, the manager-in-training for Karasuno's volleyball team!

MilkKeg09: Yes, I remember you Yachi.(:

MilkKeg09: I just wanted to check in on what my daughter was up to. It was nice meeting you all!

MilkKeg09 has gone offline.

mrrefreshing: please don't comment on it guys. Tobio's going to be upset enough as it is when he gets on and sees that his mother's been through his phone again

BROkuto: yeah, I kinda figured

Mamakoto: of course!

PhiSHIT: totally my dude!

 

 

_MilkKeg09 has come online_

_TOSSTOME has come online_

_MilkKeg09 has gone offline_

TOSSTOME: Suga what was the breathing thing for panic attacks again?!

mrrefreshing: in for 4, hold for 7, out for 8

TOSSTOME: ty

KuBRO: kenma send that photo

PokemonMaster: what

KuBRO: just do it

PokemonMaster: [Image: A close up of Kenma's face, his eyes looking down and to the side. He's wearing perfect, flawlessly winged eyeliner]

KuBRO: !!!!!!!

BROkuto: holy shit i

BROkuto: akaashi look at this

Akaaexcuseme: i will admit

Akaaexcuseme: i am a little jealous

PhiSHIT: kenMA YOU HAVE MAD SKILLS

PokemonMaster: thx

NOTMYNAME: omg teach me your ways

NOTMYNAME: I'm kou by the way i just realise di haven't introduced myself at all

BROkuto: goodevening kou

KuBRO: bokuto

BROkuto: what

KuBRO: it's twelve in the afternoon

zettairyoiki: ITS NINE IN THE AFTERNOOOON

BROkuto: it's always time for a good evening

NOTMYNAME: i agree it's always good evening no matter what the time

BROkuto: !!! a person after my own heart

IsabellaYang26: yall

IsabellaYang:26 i want to start watching anime

IsabellaYang26: gimmie some suggests

PokemonMaster: *cracks knuckles* give me five minutes to compile a list

IsabellaYang26: sounds good

JJ-style: i've lost her to the dark side

JJ-style: i will never again see my fiancee :'(

IsabellaYang26: stop being such a big baby it's just anime

JJ-style: never have i met an anime i did not hate

PhiSHIT: wait really

JJ-style: anything that's ever been suggested has just been kinda

JJ-style: meh

DaddyMaterial™: Black Butler

JJ-style: tried it, wasn't my thing

sharkjesus: one punch man

JJ-style: that was really???? idk

JJ-style: nippleless underwear crabs, man

Matsumaki02: dragon ball z

JJ-style: okay well for that one i actually tried

Hanakawa03: YoU Don"T LiEK DrAGON BaLlZ?????

JJ-style: not really no

Matsumaki02: i

Hanakawa: we are speechless JJ-style

ActualGoddess: Tokyo ghoul?

JJ-style: too much gore for my tastes

tinychihuahua: wait what's anime

respectyourelders: PRECIOUS BEAN

zettaryoiki: SO INNOCENT AND PURE

tinychihuahua: ???

ActualGoddess: we are fixing this right away Yachi come over I'm going to introduce you to the good series

tinychihuahua: um okay

PokemonMaster: JJ, what is it that makes an anime unappealing to you?

JJ-style: I have a really short attention span, so anything with super long and extensive plotlines isn't going to sit well. Gore is a no, I'm not a huge fan of fanservice, and I actually really hate it when something is dragged out over fifteen episodes - like a fight, or something. The romance genre bores me, I'm not a fan of large amounts of violence, but modern slice of life anime isn't really my thing either.

PokemonMaster: Mushi-shi

JJ-style: ?

PokemonMaster: Mushi-shi is an anime. Each episode is it's own story, so you kinda can start wherever and pick up whenever in the story you want to. It's about this dude, Ginko, who's a mushi. He can see special organisms in the world around him, called mushi-shi, which are responsible for how the earth runs. There's gore in one or two episodes (or more, haven't seen them all yet), but it's a very quiet and calm show. A+ opening theme too. It's not modern, set more in earlier Japanese times. Some of the episodes can be a little violent (supernatural mushi-shi forces getting to people and stuff) but otherwise it's pretty good.

JJ-style: that... actually sounds appealing. I'll give that a try, thanks!

PokemonMaster: np

KuBRO: i think that's the most i've seen kenma ever write

PokemonMaster: Isabella, here's a list of generally good anime to start with

PokemonMaster: Attack on Titan. Rated M, for frequent and copious violence/gore/language. Basically, it's people flying through the sky and attacking giants that bring the apocalypse. Humanity has hidden themselves behind a wall, and those giants are trying to get through and eat them. Cue humanity fighting back because we're determined little fuckers

RussianLion: yaku kenma said a bad word

fightme: son do i look like i give a shit

PokemonMaster: Fullmetal Alchemist Brotherhood: Two brothers strive to restore their bodies, after making a grave mistake. TV-14, but still pretty gory and violent. Some fanservice tossed about here and there as well.

PokemonMaster: Fruits Basket: pretty tame, not sure what i'd rate it. Some orphan chick comes to live with a family possessed by the animals of the chinese zodiac. if she hugs them, they transform into the animal they're possessed by

PokemonMaster: Mushishi, which i reccomended above

PokemonMaster: Tokyo Ghoul. Another dark, gritty M anime, with language, lots of gore, and violence. It can spends episodes at a time building up suspense, and isn't afraid to mess with your head. This kid, Kaneki, gets caught in the middle of life living between ghouls, who eat humans, and humans themselves.

sharkjesus: literally

PhiSHIT: DONT SPOIL

IsabellaYang26: Thanks, Kenma! I'll be sure to check these out!

MilkKeg09 has come online

MilkKeg09: sorry

PhiSHIT: dude no need to apologise for anything!

BROkuto: it's all fine man~

Akaaexcuseme: please stop using the tilde key

BROkuto: this thing~~?

Akaaexcuseme: .-.

BROkuto: ~~~~~

thesmollestswimmer: does anyone here read killing stalking

sharkjesus: aiichiro

thesmollestswimmer: ??

sharkjesus: you read ks

STAGBEETLESTHO: you did not strike me as the type

thesmollestswimmer: just because i look innocent doesn't mean i am...

Seung_Gil: i heard someone say killing stalking

itsmeViorNokfort: KS YES

mrrefreshing: tbh it's the innocent ones you gotta watch out for

prettykawa: ain't that right

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> for those who are still confuzzled yes kags is trans in this VwV


	6. Chapter 6

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> hello frens pls make sure uv eaten today and drinken the goodness of water stay healthy i love you guys you're important to me <<33
> 
>  
> 
> Katsuki_Yuuri: Yuuri  
> itsmeViorNokfort: Viktor  
> WinterTiger: Yuri  
> TheRealOtabek: Otabek  
> Kingkongpingpong: Guang-Hong  
> CrispytwinSara: Sara  
> CrispytwinMichele: Michele  
> Seung_Gil: Seung-Gil  
> Sexyandiknowit: Christophe  
> JJ-style: Jean-Jacques  
> IsabellaYang26: Isabella  
> SmolChickenNuggetSon: Minami  
> BasicallyNatashaRomanoff: Mila  
> NotPewdiepieK: Emil  
> Georgi Popovich: Georgi
> 
> Mamakoto: Makoto  
> BeautifulButterfly: Rei  
> WaterOtaku:Haru  
> #actualthug: Nagisa  
> NOTMYNAME: Gou
> 
> STAGBEETLESTHO: Momotarou  
> sharkjesus: Rin  
> SousuketheBuff: Sousuke  
> thesmollestswimmer: Nitori
> 
> TOSSTOME: Hinata  
> MilkKeg09: Kageyama  
> mrrefreshingSuga  
> DaddyMaterial™: Daichi  
> zettairyoiki: Noya  
> tinychihuahua: Yachi  
> respectyourelders: Tanaka  
> Yamagoodshit: Yamaguchi  
> thelastdinosaur: Tukishima  
> En-NoShit-a: Ennoshita  
> ActualGoddess: Kiyoko  
> iswearimnotathugitsjustmyface: Asahi
> 
> BROkuto: Bokuto  
> Akaaexcuseme: Akaashi
> 
> KuBRO: Kuroo  
> PokemonMaster: Kenma  
> RussianLion: Lev
> 
> OikawaNo: Iwaizumi  
> prettykawa: Oikawa  
> Hanakawa03: Hanamaki  
> Matsumaki02: Matsukawa

zettairyoiki: IM CRYIN

WaterOtaku: what happened

zettairyoiki: OKAY OKAY SO IN SCHOOL HINATA AND KAGEYAMA AND YAMAGUCHI AND GLASSES ARE DOING THE WHOLE 'TAKE CARE OF THIS EGG THING' RIGHT

thelastdinosaur: 'glasses'??? i beg your pardon

sharkjesus: glasses and speedo-glasses. you guys were meant to be a pair

thelastdinosaur: ??

BeautifulButterfly: Stop calling me that!

Yamagoodshit: i might mention that tsukki and i's egg is still very much alive and well

TOSSTOME: OUR EGG IS DEAD

MilkKeg09: WE KILLED HER

zettairyoiki: SO HINATA TRIPPED AND IT FLEW UP INTO THE AIR

zettairyoiki: AND IDK KAGEYAMA MUST'VE ACTED ON INSTICT BC BALL SHOOTING TOWARDS HIM AND HE SETS IT

respectyourelders: AND THEN HINATA RUNS UP AND JUST SPIKES IT TO THE GROUND

zettairyoiki: AND THERE IT LAY

respectyourelders: JUST SHATTERED WITH ITS YOLKY BLOOD SPREAD AROUND IT

TOSSTOME: SHE WAS OUR CHILD

TOSSTOME: WE"D BE HORRIBLE PARENTS

sexyandiknowit: is this how you both would treat your baby siblings??

TOSSTOME: I"VE NEVER SPIKED NATSU ):::

MilkKeg09: i don't think i'd set my younger siblings if i had any

sharkjesus: does this mean

sharkjesus: whatever item you throw to those two

sharkjesus: they'll set/spike it?

BROkuto: oh my god

BROkuto: kuroo

KuBRO: what

BROkuto: if we threw yaku would they set him

PokemonMaster: do you actually want to die

fightme: who the fuck no one is going to be throwing me

NotPewdiepieK: did you guys name your eggs at all?

MilkKeg09: volleyball

TOSSTOME: her name was volleyball

prettykawa: o my lord children

Yamagoodshit: we named ours Ichigo!

Katsuki_Yuuri: Strawberry? Aw, that's adorable!

Yamagoodshit: strawberries are part of tsukki's favourite food <3

fightme: KUROO LEV IS PICKING ME UP MAKE HIM STOP

KuBRO: i'm not his boyfriend jesus

fightme: HE WON'T LISTEN

RussianLion: I was trying to see if it were possible to set Yaku!!

KuBRO: sometimes it seems like i;m the mother of this team and not yaku

fightme: i'm fine with this i resign from my post as mother

KuBRO: WAIT WHAT

LeoTheMan: dude,,,,, rip,,,,,

fightme: y'hear that guys kuroo is officially mom AND dad

RussianLion: okay!

PokemonMaster: ill inform the team

KuBRO: oh my god

#actualthug: REI REI I TOLD MY PARENTS THEY'RE CHILL WITH US

#actualthug: FUCK THIS ISN'T PM IS THIS GOING TO BECOME A TRADITION OF THIS CHAT

BeautifulButterfly: They were? oh thank god i wasn't expecting my parents to react quite as well and i was hoping yours at least would be

#actualthug: you can't know until you try tho!

BeautifulButterfly: i guess...

kingkongpingpong: what's happening?

Mamakoto: congratulations you two!

WaterOtaku: nice

sharkjesus: wait what's happening

IsabellaYang26: i smell something exciting happening

#actualthug: we made a pact to come out to our parents and mine are pretty chill with it, apparently my dad had a boyfriend once

IsabellaYang26: Oh, that's awesome! Good luck if you haven't come out already, Rei!

BeautifulButterfly: Thank you. I'm not overy optimistic on the outcome, but I supposed there's always a chance for it to go well.

BeautifulButterfly: Speaking of which, they're home now. I'll update you all if it goes well.

kingkongpingpong: good luck!

sharkjesus: gl man

Mamakoto: It'll be alright, Rei!

KuBRO: don't screw up

PokemonMaster: jesus kuroo

LeoTheMan: good luck!

TOSSTOME: so i asked our teacher for a new egg and he gave me one god bless

TOSSTOME: tobio what are we going to name this one

MilkKeg09: um

BROkuto: OWL

TOSSTOME: :OOO

MilkKeg09: no

BROkuto: ))):

prettykawa: name it tooru

MilkKeg09: absolutely not

prettykawa: rude

TOSSTOME: [Image: the egg has a crudely drawn smiley face on it]

MilkKeg09: what is our egg's gender

TOSSTOME: idk egg hasn't told me yet

sharkjesus: charlie charlie what is the gender of egg

PhiSHIT: NO DEMONS

IsabellaYang26: write down a punch of pronouns on paper and roll egg onto it whichever one egg lands on is the pronouns

TOSSTOME: good idea brb

MilkKeg09: would anyone other than oikawa or bokuto like to offer up names

itsmeViorNokfort: makkachin

DaddyMaterial™: name it after Viktor's poodle yes!

MilkKeg09: but it's an egg not a dog

TOSSTOME: egg's pronouns are they/them

zettairyoiki: AM I AN UNCLE

respectyourelders: such a sweet egg *wipes tears*

Seung_Gil: name them eggbert

zettairyoiki: i want to visit my niecephew

zettairyoiki: or my nephece

Katsuki_Yuuri: excuse me but this is your local group mother checkin in to make sure everyone's eaten today are you all healthy

MilkKeg09: yes

TOSSTOME: I had omurice! it was amazing

Seung_Gil: i'm eating japchae

Isabellayang26: thank you group mom <3 and i've eaten! also what's japchae that sounds good

Seung_Gil: noodles, marinated beef and vegetables with soy sauce and sesame oil

PhiSHIT: babe taht sounds amazing :OOO

PhiSHIT: im eating but its only the best of junkfood. all these imported twinkies nomnom

Katsuki_Yuuri: phichit

PhiSHIT: yes?

Katsuki_Yuuri: exactly how many twinkies do you have

PhiSHIT: well

PhiSHIT: does anyone here remmber that tumblr post about the weed couch

#actualthug: weed couch was legendary

respectyourelders: banana for scale

PhiSHIT: well

PhiSHIT: [Image: a couch made out of Twinkies, boxes stacked neatly against a wall and a banana resting on the Twinkie couch]

PhiSHIT: banana for scale

Katsuki_Yuuri: PHICHIT CHULANONT

KuBRO: I'm not sure whether to be impressed or concerned

Yamagoodshit: Tsukki and i ate today!

prettykawa: same here

OikawaNo: oikawa

prettykawa: yes iwachan

OikawaNo: mattsun and makki say differently

prettykawa: betrayal dont u care abt ur captain children

Hanakawa03: Yes, we do

Matsumaki02: which is why we said differently

prettykawa: (눈‸눈)

prettykawa: fine im getttin something

sharkjesus: that reminds me mattsun you said in a dif chat you were going to tell us the story of how you discovered that oikawa and iwa were dating

Matsumaki02: ahh yess

Hanakawa03: twas a sunny day

zettairyoiki: I WANT TO HEAR THIS

prettykawa: a;lskdfljgskhjla nO

Matsumaki02: takahiro and i were heading into the lockerrooms after practice like people normally do

itsmeViorNokfort: im here for this relationship backstory

Matsumaki02: and there they were

Hanakawa03: moochin it up against a row of lockers

Matsumaki02: so naturally we started hooting and whistling and gave them obligatory ass slaps

Hanakawa03: Iwaizumi was so red

prettykawa: suicide laps for you two

Matsumaki02: SuCIdE LapS fOr YoU tWo

prettykawa: DO NOT MEME ME YOUNG MAN

Hanakawa03: dO nOt mEMe mE yOuNG mAn

prettykawa: IWACHAN

Matsumaki02: IwAchAN

OikawaNo: children

Matsumaki02: yes father

Hanakawa03: okei


	7. seven

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> another chapter this soon??? yall are lucky folks
> 
>  
> 
> Katsuki_Yuuri: Yuuri  
> itsmeViorNokfort: Viktor  
> WinterTiger: Yuri  
> TheRealOtabek: Otabek  
> Kingkongpingpong: Guang-Hong  
> CrispytwinSara: Sara  
> CrispytwinMichele: Michele  
> Seung_Gil: Seung-Gil  
> Sexyandiknowit: Christophe  
> JJ-style: Jean-Jacques  
> IsabellaYang26: Isabella  
> SmolChickenNuggetSon: Minami  
> BasicallyNatashaRomanoff: Mila  
> NotPewdiepieK: Emil  
> Georgi Popovich: Georgi
> 
> Mamakoto: Makoto  
> BeautifulButterfly: Rei  
> WaterOtaku:Haru  
> #actualthug: Nagisa  
> NOTMYNAME: Gou
> 
> STAGBEETLESTHO: Momotarou  
> sharkjesus: Rin  
> SousuketheBuff: Sousuke  
> thesmollestswimmer: Nitori
> 
> TOSSTOME: Hinata  
> MilkKeg09: Kageyama  
> mrrefreshingSuga  
> DaddyMaterial™: Daichi  
> zettairyoiki: Noya  
> tinychihuahua: Yachi  
> respectyourelders: Tanaka  
> Yamagoodshit: Yamaguchi  
> thelastdinosaur: Tukishima  
> En-NoShit-a: Ennoshita  
> ActualGoddess: Kiyoko  
> iswearimnotathugitsjustmyface: Asahi
> 
> BROkuto: Bokuto  
> Akaaexcuseme: Akaashi
> 
> KuBRO: Kuroo  
> PokemonMaster: Kenma  
> RussianLion: Lev
> 
> OikawaNo: Iwaizumi  
> prettykawa: Oikawa  
> Hanakawa03: Hanamaki  
> Matsumaki02: Matsukawa

_BeautifulButterfly has come online_

BeautifulButterfly: Unfortunately, my coming out did not go as well as it could have. My parents aren't rejecting it, but they're aren't really accepting, either. I think they're content to just pretend that I'm who they'd rather I was.

IsabellaYang26: That sucks :/ you've got other accepting people in your life, though?

BeautifulButterfly: I do. My aunt is ecstatic, and she's planning on taking me out for lunch this afternoon. My boyfriend and my friends are all accepting, as well.

BeautifulButterfly: Speaking of my aunt, she's here now. I'll be back on later

_BeautifulButtefly has gone offline_

IsabellaYang26: anyone else on??

thesmollestswimmer: i'm sort of on

IsabellaYang26: I don't think we've met properly, I'm Isabella!

thesmollestswimmer: i'm not on a while lot, so that's understandable. my name is nitori!

IsabellaYang26: Nice to meet you, Nitori

IsabellaYang26: So, what're you doing today?

thesmollestswimmer: oh

thesmollestswimmer: um

thesmollestswimmer: well right now i'm hoping rin-senpai isn't on because

thesmollestswimmer: i'm supposed to be at swim practice, but it's raining today and i was having kind of a really bad day and it was just so nice and calm with the rain so i skipped school and went to a nearby park

IsabellaYang26: You're not alone in that, I had college classes today and just decided to take a mental health day

IsabellaYAng26: Hopefully you're staying mostly out of the rain!

thesmollestswimmer: i am! there's a big willow tree at the park that blocks the rain mostly if not entirely when you're standing underneath it, and i bought an extra jacket in my bag if i need it.

thesmollestswimmer: the rain is making everything look really fresh and green, and all the flowers are really vibrant, and the concrete walkways are a wet shade of black

thesmollestswimmer: rain colours, i guess??? its a little hard to describe

IsabellaYang26: I think I know what you mean, like the visual version of the smell of fresh rain

thesmollestswimmer: yes! it's the colour of that scent

IsabellaYang26: Man, now I wish it was raining here! It might later on, it looks cloudy.

thesmollestswimmer: where do you live, isabella?

thesmollestswimmer: if that's not too creepy to ask i mean i'm sorry if it is

IsabellaYang26: Nah, it's alright. I live in Montreal, in Canada!

thesmollestswimmer: oh, is it nice there?

thesmollestswimmer: i live in Iwatobi, Japan

IsabellaYang26: It's nice enough, but I've lived here my whole life so it gets a little tiring after a time. I like to travel a lot, so staying in one place doesn't really suit me. How's Iwatobi?

thesmollestswimmer: i'm the opposite, haha. i'm not a fan of travelling, and since iwatobi is a smaller town it's nice and peaceful. nothing too exciting happens here, and almost everybody knows everybody else.

thesmollestswimmer: oh

thesmollestswimmer: i really should be getting back to the school, apparently people are getting worried, sorry

IsabellaYang26: That's alright, it was nice talking to you!

thesmollestswimmer: you too! bye

_thesmollestswimmer has gone offline_

 

 

 

_WinterTiger has come online_

WinterTiger: i think this is the first time i've come online and tehre was absolutely no one else

WinterTiger: it's actually peaceful

_zettairyoiki has come online_

_CrispyTwinSara has come online_

_Mamakoto has come online_

WinterTiger: fuck i jinxed it

zettairyoiki: there's so few people online :ooo

zettairyoiki: we should play never have i ever!

CrispyTwinSara: o hello folks

_NOTMYNAME has come online_

NOTMYNAME: Never have i ever??

zettairyoiki: yeah yeah okay its

zettairyoiki: we just say stuff like 'never have i ever touched a penis' and if you have touched a penis then you say you have. or like 'never have i ever robbed a store' and if you have explain exactly why

WinterTiger: okay but why choose that frst one as an example

zettairyoiki: idk first thing that came to mind

CrispyTwinSara: ( ͡° ͜ʖ ͡°)

Mamakoto: This sounds like it could be fun, I'm in!

zettairyoiki: yuri, gou, sara you guys in?

NOTMYNAME: heckaroni ya

CrispyTwinSara: sure!

WinterTiger: i guess...

zettairyoiki: alright! who wants to go first

CrispyTwinSara: i will! okay never have i ever gotten drunk

zettairyoiki: no

CrispyTwinSara: yes

Mamakoto: Yes

NOTMYNAME: Nope

WinterTiger: yep

NOTMYNAME: makoto is there something u'd like to confes

Mamakoto: It was actually Rin's fault and not mine, so you can go talk to him

NOTMYNAME: k im gon go next

NOTMYNAME: never have i ever been in handcuffs

WinterTiger: nope

NOTMYNAME: nuhuh

CrispyTwinSara: Nope

zettairyoiki: yes

Mamakoto: I have!

NOTMYNAME: maKOTO

WinterTiger: I'm not entirely sure i want to know

CrispyTwinSara: I'm more curious about noya, who hasn't gotten drunk but aparently has been in handcuffs

zettairyoiki: it was a misunderstanding involving three chickens, a knife, my volleyball coach's corner store and a police officer

WinterTiger: okay now i'm really curious

zettairyoiki: who's next!

Mamakoto: I can go next, I guess. Never have I ever had to run to save my life.

zettairyoiki: Yeppppp

WinterTiger: yes

CrispyTwinSara: nope

Mamakoto: That sounds scary, nope

NOTMYNAME: npe

CrispyTwinSara: okay okay but I really want to hear exactly what people had to run to save their lives from

WinterTiger: I got lost in a city and ended up in the middle of a gang fight

zettairyoiki: the previous misunderstanding about chickens

NOTMYNAME: yuri is a certified badass everybody

WinterTiger: (⌐■_■)

zettairyoiki: never have i everrrr

zettairyoiki: shot a gun

Mamakoto: I haven't

CrispyTwinSara: Yes!!

WinterTiger: no

NOTMYNAME: nope

zettairyoiki: no

WinterTiger: sara please explain

CrispyTwinSara: It was at a shooting range jesus im not a criminal

WinterTiger: never have i ever hitchhiked

zettairyoiki: i have!

Mamakoto: no

NOTMYNAME: nope. i feel boring

CrispyTwinSara: no

WinterTiger: i haven't

Mamakoto: Why were you hitchhiking? That's dangerous!

zettairyoiki: Tanaka/respectyourelders and i decided we wanted to walk to a nearby town to check out the mall

zettairyoiki: the town was further away than we thought and both our phones were dead. we had to hitchhike to get back to karasuno before nightfall

Mamakoto: On a tangent topic

Mamakoto: The wind just blew a whole bunch of cotton into my open window and I think I might die

CrispyTwinSara: Riiiiip my dude

zettairyoiki: wait the pretty snow trees? why is thatbad?

WinterTiger: alergies

Mamakoto: Allergies

NOTMYNAME: allergies

CrispyTwinSara: i see you all share the struggle

WinterTiger: allergies suck

 

 

 

_TOSSTOME has come online_

TOSSTOME: i thought i'd let everyone know that we've named egg Cecil!! that is all

_TOSSTOME has gone offline_

 

 

 

_Private message between: sharkjesus, IsabellaYang26_

sharkjesus: this might be a little weird but i wanted to thank you for talking with nitori today

sharkjesus: he has dysthymia, and if it's been a bad day he tends to run off without telling anyone and we're never sure if it's going to end up being a suicidal day or not, so it's really stressful when he disappears and we have no idea what's going on in his head

sharkjesus: but having someone to just talk to can really help him

sharkjesus: so yeah just

sharkjesus: thanks for talking with him

IsabellaYang26: No problem, I'm glad I was able to help!

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> i have a tumblr come visit me folks
> 
> https://whiteblood-blackmud.tumblr.com/


	8. eight

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> You thought I was dead???? It is not so!!!! Enjoy this new chapter, fOOLS
> 
> (Naw jk yall are the best thanks for sticking around <3 )
> 
> THANK U TO h2hoe FOR LETTIN ME USE THEIR USERNAME AS A NAME FOR HARUU!!!!

#actualthug: hey remember when we figured out that we can change each other's names

ActualGoddess: oh no

WaterOtaku's name has been changed to: h2hoe

h2hoe: what

sharkjesus: that's actually super fitting Nagisa 

h2hoe: i'm always a slut for water

itsmeViorNokfort: can I keep my name pls I love it and don't want it to change

Katsuki_Yuuri's name has been changed to yuurikatsucki

itsmeViorNokfort: I don't even need to ask do i

WinterTiger: nope

yuurikatsucki: but Katsuki is supposed to be before Yuuri ):

WinterTiger: don't touch it

DaddyMaterial™: new rules you can change 1 name be it your own or someone else's but after that you can't change it. Also if your name has already been changed no changing it

TOSSTOME: im tired yall

Yamagoodshit: it finally happened

thelastdinosaur: at long last, his seemingly endless energy has run out 

KuBRO: how are you tired???? You're like ALWAYS full of energy 

TOSSTOME: idk

TOSSTOME: it might've been something I ate D:

kingkongpingpong: did you eat a lot of turkey or smth???

TOSSTOME: no not turkey, if i eat gluten I get really sick and sluggish so it might've been that, idk what i ate that would've caused this tho

itsmeViorNokfort: i feel you on getting sick with gluten

TOSSTOME: :ooo you too??

sexyandiknowit: they've been denying it for so goddamn long I'm glad they're finally admitting they have allergies 

MilkKeg09: do you want me to come over

TOSSTOME: yes pls

STAGBEETLESTHO: *sighs fondly* ah, young love 

Seung_Gil: Hinata's older than you

STAGBEETLESTHO: whatever it's still young love

KuBRO: wait is chibichan the oldest of the first years???

#actualthug: first years pls gimmie birthdates and ages

STAGBEETLESTHO: im 16 and my birthday is Dec 6th

TOSSTOME: 16, June 21st!!

RussianLion: October 30th and 16!

BeautifulButterfly: Sixteen, and my birthday is on the fourteenth of December.

MilkKeg09: 16, December 22nd 

NOTMYNAME: December third, 16!

tinychihuahua: 16 and my birthday is September 4th!

WinterTiger: am i a first year???

yuurikatsucki: no you'd be a second year yura

thelastdinosaur: September 27th, 16

Yamagoodshit: I'm sixteen, and my birthday is November 10th!

#actualthug: and I'm 16 and my birthday is august 1st

#actualthug: one moment to calculate the results please

DaddyMaterial™: everyone is 16 jesus

KuBRO: they are sixteen

BROkuto: going on seventeen 

KuBRO: FELLOWS, WILL FALL IN LINE

#actualthug: and the results are in! Kageyama is our youngest first year, and Hinata is our oldest! We have a lot of winter babies also. Most of the people here are december's children.

Zettairyoiki: excuse me but if Yamaguchi is a November baby I would like to point something out

Yamagoodshit: what

Zettairyoiki: if you count nine months back, guess what month it was

Yamagoodshit: ,,,,,, what month,,,,

Zettairyoiki: February 

Yamagoodshit: D::::

Zettairyoiki: let that sink in

Yamagoodshit: nnNNNO

prettykawa: Tobio-chan is literally the youngest person in this chat 

MilkKeg09: shut up

prettykawa: so smol and innocent, such a precious baby boy

TOSSTOME: wait I'm the oldest??? I'm the king of the first years

itsmeViorNokfort: King of the first years!

BROkuto: king of the first years!!!!!!!

STAGBEETLESTHO: im gonna make you a crown and mail it to u

tinychihuahua: ughhhghg mom hasn't been home or called and I'm getting worried guys

itsmeViorNokfort: mom's on a hunting trip and she hasn't been home in a few days

tinychihuahua: my mother does not hunt demons and werewolves pls

tinychihuahua: or does she

ActualGoddess: Are you going to be alright, Hitoka?

tinychihuahua: yeah, this does actually happen often. She's probably just caught up in her work, and she'll call when she's free. Still worrying, tho ):

TOSSTOME: hitoka!!!!!! if u want we should plan a sleepover!!! Tadashi you should come too!!!!!!!

Yamagoodshit: that'd be awesome!

tinychihuahua: Both of you should pm me so we can figure this out!

TOSSTOME: yes!!!!!!! :DD

#actualthug: GGGGGGGUYS NEW VOLTRON EPISODES

Mamakoto: brb gotta go binge them

PokemonMaster: YOU SAY VOL, I SAY TRON

PokemonMaster: VOL,

IsabellaYang26: v-voltron?

PokemonMaster: no. Vol,

IsabellaYang26: voltron.

PokemonMaster: ... We'll work on that.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Kou's birthday is dec 3 bc I say so
> 
> OKAY SO. The dates are a clusterfuck. Because I lowkey forgot that all these series aren't all 2017 based. SO because I have the power of God and anime on my side, and as I am the author, I say that as now within this au universe, all of them are 2017 based. HOO BOY lets figure this out. Okay so - When this fic is set is within season one of yuri on ice, season three of haikyuu, and season two of free.


	9. Chapter 9

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I'm back again henlo folks welcome back to another episode of this flaming dumpster heap of a fic
> 
> Which will be updated significantly less than it already is??? Because I kinda have a few ideas I'm chewing on and will therefore be even more occupied than I already am so ya

fightme: ayo everyone's eaten today, right?

RussianLion: not yet

Mamakoto: EAT

sexyandiknowit: eat son

Yamagoodshit: EATING HEALTHY IS GOOD FOR UR SKIN

thelastdinosaur: wtf this isn't mystic messenger 

TOSSTOME: Tsukishima do you play mystic messenger?????

thelastdinosaur: no

Yamagoodshit: yes

thelastdinosaur: Why you gotta out me like this though

Yamagoodshit: He's currently on Yoosung's route

NOTMYNAME: I was trying to get Yoosung's route once and I accidentally got Zen's

PokemonMaster: how??????

NOTMYNAME: I just really love zen okay I needed to make sure he was okay and give him good love my husband needs it

TOSSTOME: I LOVE ZEN TOO

TOSSTOME: if I weren't dating tobio I would pledge myself to zen

Mamakoto: Is Mystic Messenger that Otome game with all of the boys?

NOTMYNAME: mako u gotta be more specific hun

PokemonMaster: ya it is

PokemonMaster: you should play it

Mamakoto: Kou and Nagisa seem to enjoy it, so I might...

PhiSHIT: JUMIN FOREVER

fightme: so u have a thing for kinky shit or

PhiSHIT: i mean

TOSSTOME: In front of my salad,,,,,,,,,,

sexyandiknowit: his username + that meme tho

Yamagoodshit: afkJAHAG

NOTMYNAME: o h m y g o d

Mamakoto: THERE ARE CHILDREN PRESENT

TOSSTOME: wait what about tossing and salad

PhiSHIT: you will learn one day son

PhiSHIT: don't look it up unless you're using incognito 

TOSSTOME: I'll go ask Noya he'll probably know 

Yamagoodshit: ...... Good plan

_yuurikatsucki has come online_

yuurikatsucki: so I took a Disney character test, and apparently I'm Gaston. I'm a little concerned.

PhiSHIT: nooooo oneeee's

RussianLion: slick as gaston!

PokemonMaster: thicc as gaston

Yamagoodshit: NO ONES THICC AS GASTON

Yamagoodshit: WAIT I WAS GONNA SAY THAT 

Yamagoodshit: MOM KENMA STOLE MY MEME

yuurikatsucki: O m g

PokemonMaster: lol

Yamagoodshit: I'm not talking to you ):

sexyandiknowit: fightfightfight

PokemonMaster: what if I told you

PokemonMaster: I had confetti squares

Yamagoodshit: in the words of Eustace Clarence Scrub, "I am a pacifist". 

PhiSHIT: paci-fist me daddy

Yamagoodshit: To quote Hamlet, act III, scene I, line 96— “no”.

yuurikatsucki: PHICHIT CHULANONT 

thelastdinosaur: why is 'Levi finally proposes to Eren' in my yt reccomendeds

sexyandiknowit: don't ship shame

thelastdinosaur: Eren is like seventeen/eighteen and Levi is in his late forties

sexyandiknowit: nvm go ahead

fightme: guys I just stubbed my toe someone please kill me

TOSSTOME: don't be upset, be spaghetti!

TOSSTOME: wait

Mamakoto: Don't be upset be spaghetti????

TOSSTOME; THATS NOT WHAT I MEANT I MEANT DONT BE UPSETTI HAVE SOME SPAGHETTI

RussianLion: don't be upset, be spaghetti

sharkjesus: okay but I'm not saying that sucking cock instantly makes you gay, it's only gay if you're a dude and you enjoy going down on another dude. A straight guy could give another guy a blowjob and just be experimenting, not gay. It's not about the act itself, it's about your preference 

sharkjesus: THIS IS THE WRONG CHAT HOW DO YOU DELETE MESSAGES

Mamakoto: RIN W H Y

sexyandiknowit: what a train wreck

_tinychihuahua has come online_

tinychihuahua: what have i walked into

thelastdinosaur: Run while you still can

RussianLion: guys i just found a bag of nuts in my drawer!!!

PhiSHIT: I LOVE NUTS THO

yuurikatsucki: ooh, what kind?

RussianLion: salted cashews!

Mamakoto: Cashews are awesome!

_number1skatingmom has logged online_

number1skatingmom: hey folks

sexyandiknowit: bonjour mon ami

sharkjesus: hola mi amigo

number1skatingmom: henlo frens

number1skatingmom: whassup

fightme: the sky

number1skatingmom: u kno what

number1skatingmom: fuk u

fightme: lol

yuurikatsucki: Vitya you forgot to do the dishes before you left for the rink

number1skatingmom: IM COMING BACK RIGHT NOW IM SORRY

yuurikatsucki: omg v i t y a it's okay I was just letting you know

yuurikatsucki: Yakov might kill you if you miss another day of training

number1skatingmom: that's tru tho,,,,,,,,,,, i'll do them for like a week straight I promise

yuurikatsucki: I'm not complaining about that

NOTMYNAME: guys I have a very important question 

NOTMYNAME: yes or no do you like allstar unironically

_Zettairyoiki has come online_

Zettairyoiki: *kicks down a door*

Zettairyoiki: soMEBODY ONCE TOLD ME

TOSSTOME: THE WORLD WAS GONNA ROLL ME

yuurikatsucki: I AINT THE SHARPEST TOOL IN THE SHED

NOTMYNAME: SHE WAS LOOKIN KINDA DUMB

number1skatingmom: WITH HER FINGERS AND HER THUMB

Mamakoto: IN THE SHAPE OF AN L ON HER FOREHEAD

fightme: if you all could kindly shut the fuck up

PhiSHIT: appreciate the shrek my dude

fightme: I have never seen shrek

Yuurikatsucki: whAT

TOSSTOME: THATS IMPOSSIBLE THO 

NOTMYNAME: BRUH EVERYONE HAS SEEN SHREK

fightme: i don't want to, never will

Zettairyoiki: we must amend this immediately 

Zettairyoiki: I cannot live knowing that there is someone who hasn't seen the wonders of shrek

RussianLion: YAKU YAKU YAKU WE CAN HAVE A MOVIE DATE AND WATCH SHREK

fightme: n o 

PokemonMaster: yaku you have to watch shrek

PhiSHIT: even kenma agrees man you gotta watch it

thelastdinosaur: do n o t watch shrek you can never return

Yamagoodshit: tsukki have you never watched shrek either???

thelastdinosaur: Akiteru made me watch it and I have regretted every single moment I am alive after that

NOTMYNAME: y'all need to set up a team movie night and marathon the shrek movies

fightme: the only movies I will marathon are LOTR/The Hobbit and the MCU

Mamakoto: A Harry Potter marathon!

sharkjesus: did someone say mcu

sexyandiknowit: can you all imagine a movie marathon with everyone in this chat group tho

Zettairyoiki: we'd need a hecking movie theatre man

number1skatingmom: a movie theatre you say

yuurikatsucki: Vitya 

number1skatingmom: hold up a second how much does it cost to rent out a theatre

yuurikatsucki: oh my god

tinychihuahua: we should hold a Jurassic park marathon!

thelastdinosaur: ... you have my attention

NOTMYNAME: ok but I feel like the only problem with a team marathon is that we'd need adult/teacher chaperones

Zettairyoiki: Ukai and Takeda sensei tho

NOTMYNAME: ya ya but like

NOTMYNAME: Takeda sensei is _not_ a night owl, he's going to be asleep before we hit ten pm

NOTMYNAME: and I don't think Ukai would enjoy watching shrek with us

thelastdinosaur: w e a r e n o t w a t c h i n g s h r e k

yuurikatsucki: do any of you have older siblings that'd be willing to chaperone?

Zettairyoiki: I mean ryu does have Saeko, but I doubt she's gonna want to stay up with us all night 

thelastdinosaur: Akiteru will not be allowed 

PokemonMaster: bring all the captains and have them be the adults

PhiSHIT: Bokuto as a chaperone tho

TOSSTOME: THATD BE SUPER COOL THO

number1skatingmom: so it costs about 750.00 to rent out a theatre for 50 people, which is roughly how many are in this chat

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> comments make me happy and when I'm happy I like to write more so comment away folks


	10. IMPORTANT UPDATE

Hey, guys! Dakoda here. 

Unfortunately, I have decided to put my life as a fanfiction writer on hold. It was getting to the point where my writing schedules were conflicting with my school and, as much as I hate it, I should honestly be focusing more on my schooling than a side hobby. I do dearly enjoy writing, but I'm just not really able to manage my time in a productive manner. 

There is also the fact that my parents are less than enthusiastic about my writing fanfiction. So, when I do write, I end up having to sneak around in incognito mode and hiding my workbooks and documents. If I want to write, I don't want to have to conceal my writing under fifty different layers of secrecy - I want to be able to be open about what I'm writing, and at this point in time it's not an option.

I understand that you're going to be upset, and I hope that you'll be able to forgive me for leaving; I'll still keep my works up, and who knows? Maybe someday in the distant future I'll return. 

Happy reading/writing, guys!


End file.
